the boys are too refined

things are really good right now and i have a lot of hope for the future.

medea ran this weekend and i'm have pretty bitter sweet thoughts about it now. sure, i'm glad i get my afternoon and evenings back - no more meetings throughout the day, rehearsals or performances. but on the other hand, this is the last show i'm going to be working on with some pretty important people who are about to graduate. rachael lang is such an inspiration. she spent hours and hours working and developing her perception of medea. she gave a stunning performance and everyone who saw the show and said anything to me commented on her vocal work in the production. john long was a great jason. he was strong and smart and he worked very hard on the role and he gave a great performance as well. i'm sad to not get to work with either of these people again (in school, that is). rachael was in my first directing project at school - we directed scenes in directing 1 class and she was 'becca' in my rabbit hole scene. john was in my first one-act, line last spring. both of them were great to work with and now they're going on into the real world. i guess my biggest hangup with the entire 'missing people' situation is that they get to go and do their thing, but i'm still in school waiting to do the same. it's weird, too, because i feel like i have a huge case of 'senioritis,' which is ridiculous because i'm only at the end of my junior year. those thoughts have got to go because i won't have time to be a piece of shit.

other exciting news: i found out today that i'm directing a main stage show next year! i'm so excited. it's the first time a student has directed on the main stage in about 5 years, so that's pretty awesome too. the show is liza and the riddling cave and it's about this mute girl who's father goes missing into the Appalachian mountains where there is a magic cave where anyone who goes inside gets frozen if they can't answer the cave's riddle. basically nobody thinks liza is worth a damn, especially her mother, but the girl is really close with her father and she's devastated when her father doesn't come home. her and her brother decide they need to go find their dad and long story short, liza - whose only talent is solving riddles - solves the riddle to free her father from the icy cave, which is possessed by the first two people to get trapped in the cave. it's a children's show, so the script is pretty simple and that makes it really open to interpretation. i'm thinking that with my production, i want to introduce the kids (probably 5th graders) to modern dance. i have a few reasons for that: 1) starting next year, we're going to be 'the school of dance & theatre' and that will be a great way to begin integrated people into this new collaborative effort that is going to leave a bunch of people feeling slightly alienated, unfortunately. 2) i like modern dance a lot and i think the story allots to movement, seeing as how liza is mute. i'll probably cast a dancer or a very movement oriented actress into the title role and go from there. 3) i've never seen a kids show like that. also, i already know i want to have a crazy light show. i think spectacle is going to be everything with this production. i also want to work with musicians. i want everything for this show, actually.

and if all else goes well, i'll hopefully have an independent study my last semester, where i get to direct something outside of the school and have it performed in the studio. that'd be pretty ridiculous. it's so great to think about the possibilities, isn't it? 

i've decided a long time ago that i want to start my own theatre company. i want to be able to produce high-quality, technologically forward theatre to a young and enthusiastic audience. i want to enlighten and inspire the community. i want to introduce new works into the theatre world and maintain and often rethink the ones that are already a staple in theatre history. i want to work with artists who have the same passions as i do. i really just want to make art and support myself by doing so. the real problem lies in HOW it's going to happen. really, though. i need to know.

i have a performance year-end review, a directing year-end review and a technical year-end review. i'm going to be reviewed out by the end of this week. i'll be talking about stage managing medea and box office management and probably possibly designing next year since i'm taking the intro to design class. melissa is directing rabbit hole and i'd love to do costumes or set for that - how cool would that be? any experience to make me more delicious to employers is what i'm looking for at this point haha. oh and john klenk is directing hal pinter's the homecoming and that's going to be amazing as well. i'd love to get cast in some shows when i'm not directing next year, but i won't hold my breath. that is really the only thing i haven't felt like i've been given the right chance at: having a really big, juicy role. i've been working so hard in acting class this year and i feel like it's about damn time, yanno?

until next time...

stand up or shut up.

A couple weeks ago, I sat in amazement while listening in the Open Forum held on campus to discuss the university’s budget and program revision plans. People were pissed. People had opinions. And no one was scared to talk about them. And now I sit at my desk and I look at my calendar and we are currently in the month of April in the year 2009. It’s strange to think that the closest I’ve gotten to a protest or a riot is sitting patiently and getting nervous when someone nicely asked a question that I thought was going to strike a wrong nerve with someone else in the auditorium. Frankly, I was anxious for the potential confrontation. Which is strange, because if we rewound through history, we could place ourselves in a time when you could simply go into the streets and start a quasi-revolution with your neighbors over the prices at the local market. A few years ago, when I would read about widespread National Disapproval of our Present, I thought: why is no one doing something about this? Why aren’t we standing up for our rights? So even today, if there are so many problems that need to be fixed, and so many people are being so negatively affected, then why aren’t we standing up and saying something about it?

There are a few ways to look at this issue. One would be that we think our concerns will go unnoticed. What we have here is the typical “my vote wouldn’t count” or “what good can one person do?” analogy that has been a negative attribute in our society around election times forever. Throughout history, the complaints of the people have often gone unnoticed. Six years ago last month, when our troops went into Iraq, the American people let out an almost unanimous breath of discontent. Many people wondered why we were putting ourselves into that position and for what valid reasons we should stay. Sure, reaching out and lending a helping hand to a needing neighbor is something that we should all encourage, but if our country is being divided over it, how much help are we giving our own country?

On the opposite side of the spectrum, maybe people feel that their concerns are actually being addressed and dealt with, thus not needing to say anything. Since the election of President Obama, it seems that many people feel as if the problems they have will be seeing the light at the end of the tunnel very soon. The Obama Administration is reassuring to many people: they seem to accept that our country is not in the best place and that there is a lot of change that needs to happen before we can start to sleep a little bit more easily at night. So until that day comes, a lot of folks are wading time and keeping faith in the leaders of our land to see us all through.

Another way to think about it is the current status of technology in the world. In my opinion, technology separates us in a much more serious fashion than we may have previously thought. Sure, as I sit at my laptop and write this, I’m falling victim to that as well, but when was the last time you went somewhere and didn’t encounter at least one person with their cell phones in tact, furiously texting away? And I know for a fact that more than half of most college campuses are filled with constant Facebook-ers, constantly updating their statuses to inform everyone of their own issues. So, why are we limiting these problems to our fingertips? Why aren’t we speaking out and escaping the blog-osphere and letting people hear what our issues with our world are today? We can’t help to get rid of the poor public school systems or resolve the same-sex marriage issues and come to an understanding if we don’t act out on our most often passionate feelings on the subjects.

Something else to consider is the thought that there are many people who remain completely uninformed of issues that threaten our daily lives because they are not in the direct aim of fire.  Mommy and Daddy gives them enough money to support their shoe fetish and have enough left over to spend on booze over the weekend, so they keep themselves detached from what people are calling the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression. It is our responsibility as citizens to make ourselves knowledgeable of the problems around us, whether they directly involve us or not. We shouldn’t wait around to get shot in the face to know about the Gun Show Loophole travesty. There is no time like now to start opening your ears and eyes to what is around you.

Or maybe people are simply embarrassed. They don’t want to say anything about those people at work who are getting laid off because the company they have been working for since before their last child was born is going under. No one wants to upset the American Dream: two and a half kids with a white-picket fence around beautiful homes. Sometimes admitting that you have a problem is the hardest part. But instead, it seems that people are satisfied with keeping their mouths shut and struggling to pay their bills at the end of the month.

Things have got to change. We can no longer sit idly by while we see our rights being taken away or our worlds changing in a way that we don’t want it to. The fate of our country – and more importantly, our own future are constantly at stake and who better to fix our problems than you and me? It is our moral obligation to search for hope in a time when hope can seem so far away. Whether it be going to an open forum and expressing frustration with your academic program losing funding or standing up as being a busy arts student saying that your days are packed and making people aware of it, we can all do our job in simple revolutions that shape our world. Anger can turn itself into something powerful; whining on your Facebook status or personal blog is no way to effectively promote change. However, using those as means of civil advancement is a starting point. That very anger can inspire real criticism, nonviolent public noncompliance. Only then will we be able to improve our shared society into a place we all want to live – furiously invading the streets, taking a deep breath and actually talking to one another about our issues. We are currently in a pivotal moment in history and apathy is killing the nation; so, honestly we need to stand up or shut up.